Iris Inc.

Big 2-0

Can’t believe that it’s been more than half a year since I last blogged. I wonder if anyone is still reading my blog? Anyway, i just celebrated my 20th birthday last week and I can already feel the aging process taking place 😦 Growing up, I was always told I don’t look my age, I felt like my body stopped aging once I turned 13. I hated it at first since I wanted to look mature and grown up and all that jazz but then I realized, hey, if this keeps up I’ll look 16 when I’m 30.  Haha, wishful thinking cause for the first time I think I actually look my age. My face looks like a 20 year old’s, well not entirely but kindda. Okay, actually I still look like a kid but the thing is that I lost some of my baby fat and  so I look a wee bit older okay? Argh, uselesss rambling aside, I actually intent to blog about something serious.

Ever since I arrived at Melbourne 2 months ago, I’ve had lots of time to think by myself since I don’t live with  my friends. A lot of alone time to reflect on my life and reevaluate my values and principles. Yeah, this is the beginning of a long and boring post about my thoughts on life so click the close tab now, I won’t be offended, seriously. Anyway, you know how some people say high school never ends, well it is kind of true. Coming to university I was expecting to be surrounded by intellectual minds but turns out everyone pretty much behaves like high school students. Bitching, back stabbing, acting like sluts/man whores to gain popularity points are still hip. I expected the partying and drunk fests but seriously, gossiping about each other, I am ashamed of myself, I should be better than that. Hello! I am an adult now. But then again, does turning 20 really make me an adult? I feel this constant pressure to act a certain way, to be all wise and stuff knowing that I’m officially out of my teens. But no matter how much I’ve changed physically, somehow mentally I still feel like a kid. I get excited when I see Spongebob on TV, I love visiting Toys R Us, I read Darren Shan, I like zoos and teddy biscuits and I like to ride my bicycle around the park. I know people will tell me that’s okay, it doesn’t make me less of an adult and I believe them, I’m not trying to hide the fact that I love doing those things. But it’s the things that I don’t do that make me feel like I am still a kid. Like how I don’t party like an animal, don’t smoke, don’t drink, don’t stay out too late, don’t hook up and don’t get wasted. I know I am better off without doing those activities anyway but in a  way I feel like I’m missing out on a big part of my university life and the passage to my adulthood is incomplete. Sounds weird but I always had this notion that if I get wasted then I’ll be considered a grown-up. Haha, now it sounds really stupid once I typed it out.

But I guest I got this idea from all those stupid low cost movies that I watch about coming of age (American Pie). The thing I learned is how you define an adult is purely up to you. To me, so far being an adult means being able to do the right thing, standing up for what you believe in, not letting anyone shake your principles, learning to truly care about the people close to you, learning who’s your true friends and who’s just using you and having a strong spiritual connection to yourself. A lot of things have happened prior to my birthday that have made me question my values and what I believed in. It made me see things in a different light and in many ways have helped me grow as a person. I have made a lot of mistakes in the past and I will continue to make new ones but that doesn’t make me less of an adult as long as I learn from them. So that’s what growing up is all about, being able to move on and be better person everyday. Gosh, I’m babbling now but I’m a bit enthusiastic today. Oh! Knowing what’s important to you and what makes you happy is really important too. Trying to live up to other people’s standard of coolness and gaining their acceptance is so high school, everyone knows they’re only as cool as they think they are. There is always gonna be people who think so highly of themselves that they think everyone else should live their life like them, act like them, talk like them and probably shit like them too. Well, tell these people to look into the mirror and ask themselves why are they such losers?

So the main thing is to stay true to yourself, if you ever start to doubt your decisions, take a step back and reflect upon what’s important to you. That’s what I’m learning to do. Becoming an adult means lots of decisions too so better start practicing before I really eff up something big. But, I want to hold on to the part of me that likes kiddie stuff, like retaining my childish charm. Haha, charm. You can never take life too seriously, where’s the fun in that? Sometimes, actually a lot of times, it’s better just to laugh things off like a kid and have fun with your life, we only live once or so they say. 🙂

To add on something by Dr. Seuss,  ‘Adults are just obsolete children and the hell with them’.

Until my next post (hopefully not too long from now), cheers!

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April 6, 2010 - Posted by | Uncategorized

2 Comments »

  1. The way I see it, wisdom comes and goes.

    You must first have to be young and stupid to be old and wise. (I found that on the backgrounds app on my iPod :P)

    I just decided that I like your blog, so I’m going to read more of it.

    Comment by J. | June 20, 2010

  2. Thanks for the comment, nice to know that my blog actually has visitors haha

    Comment by irisinc | June 22, 2010


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